Flann O'Brien: Plays and Teleplays Read online

  I am indebted to John O’Brien and Jeremy M. Davies at Dalkey Archive Press for entrusting me with the work of editing these plays for publication. I must also thank Neil Murphy who has served as both advisor and collaborator over the years. Thanks also to Jack Fennell—who translated The Knife (An Scian) from the Irish—and to Keith Hopper, for his enthusiasm about O’Brien’s work. Much thanks is also offered to Aaron Lisec and James Bantin at Southern Illinois University Morris Library, to Robert O’Neill and Justine Sundaram at Boston College Burns Library, and to Scott Krafft at Northwestern University Charles Deering McCormick Library.

  * * *

  1 That too was later changed to Myles na Gopaleen.

  2 According to Clissman (Clissmann, Anne. Flann O’Brien: A Critical Introduction to his Writings [Dublin: Macmillan, 1975], p. 260), it ran until late March. However, Costello and Van de Kamp claim it only ran for two weeks (Costello, Peter, and Peter van de Kamp. Flann O’Brien: An Illustrated Biography [London: Bloomsbury, 1987], p. 81).

  3 Quoted in Costello and Van de Kamp, p. 81.

  4 Ibid, p. 81.

  5 Ibid, p. 81.

  6 Cronin, Anthony. No Laughing Matter: The Life and Times of Flann O’Brien (London: Grafton, 1989), p. 134.

  7 Costello and Van de Kamp, p. 81.

  8 Hopper, Keith. Flann O’Brien: A Portrait of the Artist a Young Post-Modernist, Revised 2nd edition, with a foreword by J. Hillis Miller (Cork: Cork UP), 2009, p. 24.

  9 Costello and Van de Kamp, p. 82.

  10 Ibid, p. 11.

  11 Ibid, p. 13.

  12 “Introduction to O’Brien, Flann. Rhapsody in Stephen’s Green: The Insect Play? ed. Robert Tracy (Dublin: Lilliput Press, 1994) p. 15.

  13 Cronin, p. 213.

  14 As Anthony Cronin explains, this was not the end of the story, as a little more than a decade later O’Brien would write a defense of the play in Cruiskeen Lawn: “He was by then (1954) of the opinion that it was ‘a masterpiece, saturated with a Voltaire quality, and penetrating human stupidity with a sort of ghoulish gusto.’“ Cronin, p. 135.

  15 Clissman, p. 263.

  16 An Scian was discovered in the Boston College archives by Louis de Paor in 2002.

  17 Listed as The Ideas of O’Dea in Clissman and on the manuscripts themselves, they were eventually produced by RTE as O’Dea’s Your Man.

  18 Clissman lists only fourteen, but there are two separate “No. 12” scripts. Of these fifteen, however, only thirteen were produced.

  19 In the only sustained critical reading of any of Flann O’Brien’s plays, Amy Nejezcj-leb makes the case for the importance of the teleplays within the O’Brien canon by citing their popularity: “In the letter to Legge dated 15 February 1964, he indicates that his television series, O’Dea’s Yer Man, is more successful than his work at the Irish Times: ‘My stuff for Jimmy O’Dea on Telefis has the highest TAM rating in the country, with advertising time before and after it booked into 1965.’“ She also argues that Marie-Thérèse serves as something of a counter-argument to critics concerned about evidence of misogyny in Flann O’Brien’s novels. (“O’Brien’s Your Man: Myles, Modernity, and Irish National Television,” ‘Is It About a Bicycle?’: Flann O Brien in the Twenty-First Century, ed. Jennika Baines [Dublin: Four Courts Press, 2011], p. 100).

  A Note on the Texts

  The version of Faustus Kelly included here is based exclusively on the Cahill Publishers edition of 1943, which was optioned by the publisher before the play was produced. The version of Rhapsody in Stephen’s Green: The Insect Play included in this volume comes from the complete “production copy” of the play that Robert Tracy discovered at the Northwestern University Library. I have followed Tracy’s lead in ignoring what he refers to as the various “stage directions and deletions by Hilton Edwards,”1 meaning that with the exception of very minor typographical changes the inclosed version mirrors Tracy’s Lilliput Press edition of the play.2 I have also taken the liberty of including two versions of Thirst in this collection. The shorter version will be familiar as the text published in Cockburn’s Stories and Plays.3 In her Critical Introduction Anne Clissman quotes approvingly from the longer version—which is nearly fifty percent longer than the published version.4 Both plays are represented in the archives at Southern Illinois and Boston College (see below); however, there is nothing in the archives that indicates which of the two was intended as the final version.

  The remainder of the enclosed plays and teleplays are taken from either of two archives: the Brian O’Nolan Papers, 1914–1966 (1/4/MSS 051), Special Collections Research Center, Morris Library, Southern Illinois University, Carbondale; and the Flann O’Brien Collection, 1881–1991 (MS97-27), Archives and Manuscripts, John J. Burns Library, Boston College. I have given preference to hand-written amendments and have corrected occasional typographical errors. Some of the versions at Southern Illinois University and Boston College include accompanying sketches drawn by Flann O’Brien himself, not reproduced here. Stylistically, I have followed the lead of Keith Hopper and Neil Murphy in The Short Fiction of Flann O’Brien; that is: “The punctuation, which varies a little from play to play, has been standardised (em-dashes without spaces—for instance—is the preferred format, while we also use three dots and a space for ellipses mid-sentence . . . and four dots for ellipses at the end of sentences. . . .). Throughout the volume, English and Hiberno-English spellings are used instead of the American forms.”

  The standard publication format for printed versions of stage plays that have been performed is to include both a list of “Characters in the Play” with descriptions (dramatis personae) along with an original cast list. However, I have not included dramatis personae for The Insect Play or The Handsome Carvers—as none were provided by Flann O’Brien himself (The Knife, The Handsome Carvers, and A Moving Tale: A Dublin Hallucination have no casts lists since they were never performed). For the same reason, many of the teleplays do not contain a list of Players (and none contains a cast list).5

  * * *

  1 “Introduction to O’Brien, Flann. Rhapsody in Stephens Green: The Insect Play? Ed. Robert Tracy (Dublin: Lilliput Press, 1994) p. 1.

  2 Robert Tracy’s edited version of The Insect Play also includes extensive endnotes explaining various cultural and intertextual elements to the play. This version by comparison takes a more “popular” approach.

  3 Flann O’Brien, Stories and Plays, ed. Claud Cockburn (1973; London: Paladin, 1991), pp. 81–94.

  4 Clissman, p. 263.

  5 O’Brien also wrote up a short treatment for a television series based on The Third Policeman—The Detectional Fastidities of Seargeant Fortell—which is so slight an effort (two pages of preface material) that I have decided not to include it in the current colume. I have also left out his translation into Irish of Brinsley MacNamara’s Margaret Gillan, as well as acts three, four, and five of an untitled play in Irish housed at Boston College’s Burns Library. There have also been various stage adaptations of some of O’Brien’s novels, including The Saints Go Cycling In by Hugh Leonard, on which O’Brien is known to have collaborated: “O’Brien had, in fact, consulted closely with Leonard during rewriting and, though he does not seem to have had much of a hand in the actual structuring of the play, he was able to comment on the spirit of the book” (Clissman 336). As the play is definitively Leonard’s, however, it is not included here. It is also perhaps worth mentioning Myles Apart, a series of scripts Flann O’Brien wrote for radio. However, there is very little that resembles a proper play script in these pieces, as they are monologues fashioned along the lines of The Cruiskeen Lawn columns (“The Lurch of Time,” a sketch housed at University of Southern Illinois, Carbondale, is similar to Myles Apart).

  A Note on the Text

  SOURCES AND RESOURCES

  Myles na gCopaleen, Faustus Kelly: A Play in Three Acts. Dublin: Cahill 1943; Reprinted in: O’Brien, Flann. Stories and Plays. Claud Cockburn, ed. (1973; London: Paladin, 1991), pp. 95–166.

&nbs
p; Myles na gCopaleen, Rhapsody in Stephen’s Green: The Insect Play, Northwestern University Library Special Collections, Gate Theatre Archive; Previously published as Flann O’Brien, Rhapsody in Stephen’s Green: The Insect Play, Robert Tracy, ed. Dublin: Lilliput Press, 1994.

  Myles na gCopaleen, Thirst (short version), complete typescript (undated), box 3, folder 15, Flann O’Brien Collection, Boston College. This version is also available from the Carbondale archive, box 4, folder 7. Previously published in Stories and Plays, Claud Cockburn, ed. (1973; London: Paladin, 1991), pp. 81–94.

  Myles na gCopaleen, Thirst (long version), complete typescript (undated), box 3, folder 15, Flann O’Brien Collection, Boston College.

  Myles na gCopaleen, An Scian, box 4, folder 9, Flann O’Brien Collection, Boston College.

  Myles na Gopaleen, The Handsome Carvers, box 4, folder 29, Flann O’Brien Collection, Boston College.

  Myles na Gopaleen, A Moving Tale, box 4, folder 28, Flann O’Brien Collection, Boston College.

  Myles na Gopaleen, The Boy from Ballytearim, box 4, folder 31, Flann O’Brien Collection, Boston College.

  Myles na Gopaleen, The Time Freddie Retired, box 4, folder 2, Flann O’Brien Collection, Boston College.

  Myles na Gopaleen, Flight, box 4, folder 4, Flann O’Brien Collection, Boston College.

  Myles na Gopaleen, The Man with Four Legs, box 4, folder 25, Flann O’Brien Collection, Boston College.

  Myles na Gopaleen, The Dead Spit of Kelly, box 21, folder 4, Flann O’Brien Collection, Boston College.

  Myles na Gopaleen, O’Dea’s Your Man, Episode One—The Meaning of Malt, box 5, folder 6, Brian O’Nolan Papers, Special Collections Research Center, Morris Library, Southern Illinois University, Carbondale.

  Myles na Gopaleen, Th’ Oul Lad of Kilsalaher, Episode One—Trouble About Names, box 5, folder 3, Brian O’Nolan Papers, Special Collections Research Center, Morris Library, Southern Illinois University, Carbondale.

  STAGE

  PLAYS

  FAUSTUS KELLY

  Characters in the play

  KELLY

  CULLEN

  REILLY

  HOOP

  SHAWN KILSHAUGHRAUN

  TOWN CLERK

  MRS. MARGARET CROCKETT

  HANNAH

  CAPTAIN SHAW

  THE STRANGER

  Chairman of the Urban Council

  Members of the Council

  An ex-T.D., also a member

  A Corkman

  A widow

  Her maid

  A visitor

  ?

  Faustus Kelly was first performed at the Abbey Theatre, Dublin, on 25 January 1943, with the following cast:

  KELLY

  F. J. McCormick

  CULLEN

  Fred Johnston

  REILLY

  Michael J. Dolan

  HOOP

  Denis O’Dea

  SHAWN KILSHAUGHRAUN

  Brian O’Higgins

  TOWN CLERK

  Cyril Cusack

  MRS. MARGARET CROCKETT

  Ria Mooney

  HANNAH

  Eileen Crowe

  CAPTAIN SHAW

  Gerard Healy

  THE STRANGER

  Liam Redmond

  Directed by Frank Dermody

  Designed by Michael Clarke

  PROLOGUE

  Stage is blacked out. A faint white light picks out the head and shoulders of the DEVIL and the head of KELLY. The DEVIL is standing behind KELLY, who is seated signing a diabolical bond. When he has it signed, the DEVIL reaches out a green-tinted claw and snatches up the document with a sharp rustling noise. Immediately there is a complete black-out.

  ACT I

  The setting of the First Act is the Council Chamber, which is also used by the TOWN CLERK as his office. It is a spacious room with a window at side, left; the door is left. The TOWN CLERK’S desk with adjacent typist’s table and various office effects are on the right-hand side of the room. In the remaining two-thirds of the floor space stand the large table and chairs used for meetings of the Council. The side of the table faces audience and one side should be long enough to accommodate four chairs. REILLY and KILSHAUGHRAUN sit at the ends in ACT I. At back is a recessed platform railed off and marked with a sign ‘SILENCE: Public Gallery.’ When the curtain goes up CULLEN and REILLY are discovered in casual attitudes, evidently waiting for the others.

  CULLEN: That was a bad business out the road, Martin.

  REILLY: I was just saying today that if we didn’t do something to control them motorcars, they’ll wipe out the whole lot of us.

  CULLEN: I wouldn’t blame the motorcar, Martin. The motorcar is man’s friend. Fair is fair. Blame where blame is due, as the man said. Where do you leave Mister John Barleycorn?

  REILLY: O, I know. I’m not making any excuse for that, the driver was fluthered, I’m told. And the lady was no better. A very bold article, I believe, with a man’s breeches on her—

  CULLEN: Well, there you are! A young drunken pup flying around the country in transports of intoxication, killing hens, cows, pigs and Christians—and you blame the motorcar! What sort of reasoning is that, man?

  REILLY: (With great feeling.) I’d like to see all the motorcars in the world destroyed.

  CULLEN: Faith, Martin. I often think you’re not all in it.

  REILLY: I’m sure of one thing—it’s only in a motorcar you’d see a bold article like her with her trousers and her brazen face and her big backside.

  CULLEN:(Laughing.) Ah, Martin, you’re very hard on the poor motorcars.

  REILLY: (Paying no attention.) Isn’t it a terrible thing to have young people misbehavin’ and drivin’ around drunk and killin’ people? Is it any wonder they have them retreats above in the Chapel?

  CULLEN: Maybe they were brother and sister.

  REILLY: And what brother, in God’s name, would let his sister go around with pants on?

  CULLEN: (Doubtfully.) O, I don’t know. (Reflectively.) My own sister Maggie, now, or a girl with that class of a figure. . . .

  REILLY: (Exploding.) Get away outa that, man, for pity’s sake. You ought to be ashamed of yourself. . . . (Gets up and looks out of window. Comes back frowning.) There’s nothing but trousers in Russia, I’m told. Men, women and children go about all day working at ingines and thrashing machines, no privacy or home-life or respect for womanhood. That’s where you ought to be, in Russia. Away out with a crowd of madmen thrashing and working away for further orders. Father Peter was telling me that a business like that can’t last. Couldn’t possibly last.

  CULLEN: (Smiling some good-humour back into the conversation.) Russia, is it? Ah, a beautiful but distant land. The Russian bear, the Russian steamroller. The Volga, the Vistula and the Dnieper. The grave of Napoleon’s Grand Army. Never fear, Martin, ould Ireland’s good enough for me. (He pauses.) The Big Man, Mr. Kelly, is late tonight. So are the others.

  REILLY: The Chairman’s late every night but always in time to bawl off some unfortunate man that’s two minutes later. (He sits.)

  CULLEN: True enough. Do you remember the night he went for me? (Mimicking.) Am I to understand, Mr. Cullen, that you desire to have your name recorded as having been present at this meeting? Don’t exert yourself talking, Mr. Chairman, says I, till you get your breath back, because them stairs would kill a horse! (Laughs appreciatively.) Wasn’t it good? He was just in before me. ‘Don’t exert yourself talking, Mr. Chairman, till you get your breath back, because them stairs would kill a horse.’

  REILLY: (Very drily.) Yes.

  CULLEN: I think I hear the bould Shawn.

  REILLY: (Makes a grimace of distaste and rises stiffly and shambles to the window.) Well, for God’s sake keep him off politics because that fellow has me worn out with his politics.

  CULLEN: Good evening to you, Shawn.

  (SHAWN KILSHAUGHRAUN enters from main door, back right. He is a thick, smug, oafish character, dressed in a gawkish blue suit. He exudes a tre
acly good-humour, always wears an inane smile and talks with a thick western brogue upon which sea-weed could be hung. Hangs hat on stand, right of door.)

  SHAWN: Bail o Dhia annso isteach. Hullo, Tom. And how is Martin.

  REILLY: (Sourly.) Martin is all right.

  SHAWN: (Expansively.) Well, isn’t it the fine-glorious summer evening, thanks be to God. Do you know, the air is like wine. I’m half drunk, drinkin’ it in. Ah, but ‘tis grand. A walk on a day like that would do you as much good as a good iron tonic.

  CULLEN: It’s great weather, there’s no doubt. I’d like to take off all my clothes and lie out in the meadow as stark naked as God made me.

  REILLY: (Turning quickly from the window.) You’d get all you want of that carry-on in Russia. You can wheel a wheelbarra down the main street of Moscow without a stitch on you and the people will say you’ve a nice new barra. That’s the place for you—Russia. (Sits right of table.) He’s off to Russia, Shawn, that’s the latest.

  SHAWN: Do you tell me so?

  REILLY: He’s going to make his sister, Maggie, wear trousers and drive a thrashing-mill. If he could find a mine, he’d send me and you down, to be working with pneumatic artillery in the bowels of the earth and blasting tons of rocks and stuff down on top of us. Two miles down he’d send us.

  SHAWN: Yerrah, now, you’re coddin’ me surely. You’re trying to take a rise out of me. (Sits left of table.)